Alright, listen up! Today, I’m gonna tell you all about this fire brick oven pizza. It’s the best, I tell ya! Better than that stuff you get from the store. My goodness, that stuff is not good.
First off, you gotta have that brick oven. Not just any oven, mind you. It’s gotta be made of them fire bricks. Keeps the heat in real good. Makes the pizza all crispy and yummy. That fire, she’s gotta be roaring! Hotter than a hen house in July. If not hot enough, the pizza, she not gonna cook right.
You need a good fire for this kind of pizza. Just use them hardwood logs. Or that charcoal stuff. Build that fire right inside the oven. Get it nice and hot. Let it burn, burn, burn! Until you got them coals glowing like the devil’s eyes. That’s when you know it’s ready for the pizza. That’s the key to brick oven pizza.
Now, for the pizza itself. You gotta have good stuff to make it. Good dough, you know? Flour and water, that’s all it takes. Maybe a pinch of salt, if you’re feeling fancy. And yeast, can’t forget the yeast! Mix it all up, let it sit a while. Let it rise up good and proper. Dough need to be good for a good fire brick oven pizza.
- Good flour
- Water
- Yeast, don’t forget that yeast!
- Salt, if you want
Then you gotta roll it out. Not too thin, not too thick. Just right, like Goldilocks’ porridge. Then you put on your sauce. Tomatoes, garlic, some herbs. Whatever you like. My neighbor, she likes to put onions on hers. I don’t know about that. Then comes the cheese. Lots and lots of cheese. The stringy kind. Makes it all gooey and good. A good cheese is a must for a good fire brick oven pizza, remember that.
And the toppings! Oh, the toppings! You can put anything on there. Pepperoni, sausage, mushrooms. Whatever your heart desires. Just don’t go putting pineapple on it. That’s just wrong. I saw that on the TV once. Pineapple on pizza. What’s this world coming to?
Then, you slide that pizza into the oven. Right on them hot bricks. Be careful now, it’s hot! Don’t need to put parchment paper. Just put the pizza on the firebricks. You need a big ol’ paddle for that. Like the one they use to stir the laundry. But clean, of course. Can’t have no soap on your pizza.
Now, you gotta watch it close. It cooks fast in that hot oven. Just a few minutes. Maybe four or five. Keep an eye on it. Don’t let it burn. Burnt pizza is no good. Unless you like that burnt taste. Some folks do. Not me. I like my pizza just right. This kind of pizza, she cook real fast. 60 to 90 seconds. That’s all it takes! You gotta keep the oven hot, hotter than 806 degrees.
When it’s done, you pull it out. All bubbly and golden brown. Let it cool a bit. Don’t want to burn your mouth. Then you slice it up and eat it. It’s the best pizza you’ll ever have, I guarantee it. Hot and fresh, that’s the fire brick oven pizza.
Now, some folks, they like that deep dish pizza. The kind they make in Chicago. Thick crust, lots of sauce. It’s more like a pie than a pizza, if you ask me. I don’t know, I prefer the thin, crispy crust you can only get in a brick oven.
But this fire brick oven pizza, it’s the real deal. It’s the way pizza was meant to be. Cooked in a hot oven, with a crispy crust and a smoky flavor. You can’t get that from them other ovens. Nope. It’s gotta be a brick oven. No other way will do. And that fire, gotta keep that fire hot! Otherwise, your pizza gonna be no good.
So, there you have it. Everything you need to know about fire brick oven pizza. Now go on out there and make yourself one. You won’t regret it. Just remember what I told you. Hot fire, good dough, lots of cheese. And no pineapple! That’s the secret. That’s the way to make a pizza that’s better than anything you can get at the store. Believe me, I know. I’ve been making these pizzas for years. Longer than you’ve been alive, probably. You need to taste to believe me.
You take care now, you hear? And enjoy that pizza! I’m telling you this fire brick oven pizza is the best pizza you will ever have in your life!
